I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Randomize
