I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
