real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
