why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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