Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
