$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
