Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
