Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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