that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
