But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize
