If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Ketchup is God's man juice
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
