no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
