I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
