We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
love makes seman taste better
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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