I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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