my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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