I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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