Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
