i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
