Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I know her cup size but not her name....
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
