I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
