Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
