Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
