I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
