i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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