I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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