he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
