Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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