and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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