That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
