ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
