Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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