Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
