IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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