there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
Randomize
