Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
my poor anus
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Randomize
