Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
