We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I'm passing your future prison.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
