First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
