You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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