yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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