Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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