whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
