Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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