that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Randomize
