Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
