Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I am mentally ready for anal.
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