All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
