on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
