you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
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